Voidtools Everything

Posted by 22111
Apr 9, 2022 at 07:54 AM

The Birkin Reach-Out aka iPhone

So much for the Patek sting, and sorry for some language faults, at 1 a.m. this morning (not only 95 cent instead of 95 per cent, and so on); I also should have spoken of luxe bag ladies de luxe, carrying their allegedly necessary things around with’em in (mostly) Hermès bags in the (sometimes even higher-up, when lizard, etc) 5-digit price range, the most prominent of these named after the prettiest original carriers of’em’all, Birkin (no, not the husband) - wikipedia instructs you that one was introduced in… 1984: well, if I had some pun intended here, I would have made up that indeed! - Sometimes, a newborn even carries its heart outside of its body, and then the papers show pictures of it, half-naked; not so with Birkin bearers: you could say they buy Birkins in order to NOT have to deambulate all naked in this cruel world!

But why “necessary” then? Because of the “I might need”-“Then I don’t have to think about” combination, which according to me is the motivational surface, whilst behind that lures some brain outsourcing, I pretend to glimpse - well, Marie Curie had been dead in 1984 already, so she’s not availabe to prove me wrong, and there is no Curie bag, as far as I’m informed.

As implied above, the aforementioned bags start in the 5-digit price range, some rare high-4-digit versions (do they even exist anymore, with inflation an’all that?) being considered cheap and not qualified to give satisfaction - well, the German “satisfaktionsfähig” is so much superior once more, but it’s too complicated to also being anglicized… they did it with “ersatz” though, and indeed, and the ersatz notion’s all over the place here indeed.

Anyway, to fill the bags up, accordingly, they made Nokias (remember that age?) in gold with diamonds (just google “nokia with diamonds”), and they created the Vertu (see vertu.com, “free shipping”!), but since half-a-million dollar phones of doubtful taste are out-of-reach for most, Apple created the reach-out for virtually everyone, and so that virtually everyonce could ostensibly prove their infallible taste, by a come-handy purchase in the higher-up 3-digit range, and that’s why Apple stake holder finally got really rich: the Birkin ersatz got to the schoolyard, and even in the suburbs: chapeau !

And yes, whilst the Nokia Communicator - with a real, albeit not very sturdy, keyboard! - tried to cope with the web as well as it could, the iPhone literally played with the web, put it… at your fingertips, provided you with (pseudo) mastery of its content, and that, indeed, was a revolution, the ultimate victory over the previous Birkin “yes, you prove you’re rich, but you either think of ***it*** in time, or you will have to wait, sorry!” rule (wikipedia: “An “it girl” is an attractive young woman, who is perceived to have both sex appeal and a personality that is especially engaging.” - a-ha! well, it’s always the bearer’s mind speaking, any, even nonverbal, communication being foremost subjective):

From now on, you could leave home even blank-minded, and then, you just needed the appropriate search terms (and the appropriate mobile contract), and, never-ever, you’d be all-naked in public! - now compare with the, today defunct, then deadly, classic notion of the “dumb blonde”, incarnated, via brilliant acting, by Monroe and Bardot, among others, and characteristically, there is no Monroe or Bardot bag model, since for an alleged dumb blonde, the claim “I’ve got my brain with me” would have instantly appeared hilarious, and thus would have spontaneously back-fired.

So, the iPhone saved half of humanity, even in its non-gold, non-rosy business woman versions, and the other half got the idea that from now on, finally, it was given to anybody to appear as a mine of information, and thus it’s really not surprising that Apple, financially, is where it stands: they invented the, apparent, ultimate empowering machine for Jane Doe (no pun to Birkin intended, and of any sex anyway).

And, even more, there’s even interlinking coming with it, so that Jane now gets even the impression her/their thinking’s enhanced (cf. the common dream of this forum’s contributors, software-wise), and how then wouldn’t she (always read: they) want to go into debt even, with her mobile provider, if necessary, to reach out to these spheres, formerly known to her as “their world, closed to me (must be my upbringing though, my genes are excellent)” (narc’s comfort, y’know?)?

But at the end of the day, this “open up” isn’t an intransitive one, it’s not about thinking now, it’s just about home delivery of, for most of it, indigestibles, of the same, for Jane that is, inscrutable “content” she’d always remained intellectually shy with, and btw, thinking’s about creating your own links, not following others’.

Encyclopedias don’t create on their own, and even delivering any knowledge there is, on paper at home, or electronicatlly to your always-on device wherever you are, will not make you (read: Jane) the necessary connections, almost any election, any poll out there proving me right.

Oh, and wikipedia on “Outbrain”: “Advertisers pay Outbrain on a pay-per-click basis and a portion of that revenue is shared with publishers.” - so much for, again, subliminal false promises and consequent dis-illusions.

As for “secondary benefits at least”, well, I read yesterday of some (male) Jane being saved out of an avalanche (how did she get into that, to begin with, say?), by pressing some (remaining) knob on her iPhone 5 times in a row or something, and with just 3 p.c. battery power remaining: so good for her! But protagonists in movies before the millennium, i.e. before the mobile’s advent, appear to me less continually, inherently agitated, hounded and rushed than their counterparts since, except for when the plot asked the former to start to run for a phone booth.

The good ol’times, then, but smart phones (or any anything else then) didn’t make Jane (m/f/d) any smarter since, according to my observation that is.